The first time was when I was 18. I had been mugged in an alley, and he stepped in to save me. He took a knife to his right hand, and the injury damaged his radial nerve.
After that, he could never lift heavy objects again, and his dream of becoming a pianist was crushed forever.
The second time was during the earthquake. We were trapped together under the rubble.
He tricked me into eating the last of the food and water, giving me the only chance at survival. If the rescue team had arrived even a little later, he would have died in that debris.
The third time, when a huge truck came barreling toward us, he pulled me into his arms without hesitation.
Shards of flying glass pierced the back of his head, but because he held me so tightly, I walked away with nothing more than a few scratches.
He had risked his life for me three times. How could I ever hope to stop loving him?
Sebastian didn’t wait for my answer. Growing impatient, he said, “Well? Are you coming to see the meteor shower or not?”
Snapping back to reality, I gave him a bright smile. “Sure. Tonight, we’ll watch the meteor shower together.”
Only then did Sebastian’s frown finally ease.
He flagged down a taxi.
“I’ll drop you off at home first. I’ll come pick you up later, and we’ll head to the observatory,” he said.
Just then, his phone rang. After answering, his brow immediately furrowed.
“Gillian hurt her hand. I’m gonna go check on her. You head home by yourself, okay?”
I nodded. “Alright.”
He looked at me, surprised. “You used to hate it when I went to see her. What, you had a change of heart?”
I opened my mouth to say something, but he let out a cold laugh before I could.
“Right. I guess it doesn’t matter anymore. We’re married now, so she’s no threat to you. Text me when you get home. I’m heading out.”
He climbed into the car and left, never once seeing the disappointment and bitter smile on my face.
The truth was, I had never really tried to stop him from caring about Gillian.
It was just that one time, Sebastian’s parents and I had accidentally witnessed Gillian kissing a much older man.
After digging a little deeper, we found out she had long been kept by different sugar daddies.
Only then had I tried desperately to keep Sebastian from getting too involved with her.
But he never knew. Even after Gillian’s death, he spent ten whole years drowning in guilt and grief.
If I had to choose, I would rather see him together with Gillian than watch him suffer endless pain and, in the end, die because of me.
Guilt and self-reproach could crush a person completely.
