5
After that day, Cole and I had no contact.
Until the next weekend.
The show’s live broadcast operated on a rotation system. This weekend, we were supposed to switch back to our original couples.
“Director,” Vera said, her tone full of feigned consideration for the show. “Ashton and I are so popular right now. If you switch us back, the audience
will be furious.”
The director thought for a moment. “But-”
“Ashton, Vera turned to him. “What do you think?”
In front of me, she asked Ashton, “Who are you choosing tonight?”
She had been waiting for this moment. The more a thing has to be hidden, the more one craves for it to be chosen in public.
Ashton understood her. He deliberately glanced at my face, then leaned back in his chair.
“Is that even a question? The audience doesn’t want to see her.”
Vera got the answer she wanted and turned to me. “Chloe, you don’t mind, do you? But you’ve been a housewife for so long, you probably don’t have much work experience. The audience’s approval is the most important thing. You should think about the big picture…”
“Fine,” I said curtly.
Ashton looked up at me. They all thought I was going to make a scene. That way, they could edit my reaction into a special segment to highlight
Vera’s thoughtfulness.
They didn’t expect me to be so agreeable.
Vera, with a speech she had memorized, was left with nothing to say. She finally managed a dry, “Good. No take–backs.”
“Let’s just keep it this way from now on,” I said.
Her face stiffened for a second, then she smiled, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Are you trying to make Ashton jealous?” she whispered. “Every- one knows you’re on this show to win him back. Too bad he’s not jealous at all, and you have to watch him walk into my room.”
Chapter 1
2015
The director’s team called out. They decided to continue with last week’s setup.
Before leaving, Ashton asked Vera, with a hint of amusement, “Aren’t you afraid of her being in a room with Cole?”
At the mention of that name, Vera’s reaction was a bit over the top. She laughed as if she’d heard the world’s biggest joke.
“I’ve never seen him like anyone. Her? He could be locked in a room with her for a year and still not be interested.”
They exchanged a knowing look and a smile. Ashton, in front of me, deliberately took off his coat and put it on Vera.
“Chloe, if you want to win me back, these tricks aren’t good enough.”
He wanted to provoke me, to make me break down in public so he could play the victim.
Ashton and Vera were taken to a luxury villa, a reward for being the couple with the highest heart rate last week. Vera posted a picture of their
candlelit dinner on social media. The comments were all from ecstatic fans.
I saw all this on my phone in the production team’s van.
The van was heading towards the old part of the city.
If their heart rate doesn’t go up today, they’re going to be eliminated, right?】
【They won’t eliminate Cole. His status is too high. They’ll probably just switch his partner.]
[This is boring. Why did Cole even agree to do this show?】
【The weirder it gets, the more I ship it. I have a feeling something is going to happen.]
【The person above is nuts!!! If anything actually happens, I’ll eat my own poop on a live stream!!!]
I put my phone away and asked the staff, “Where are Cole and I staying tonight?”
“Your heart rate was the lowest, so you have to face a penalty. Tonight, you’ll be staying in…”
The van stopped. He tilted his chin towards the old residential building in front of me. “There,” he said. “A rental apartment.”
I got out of the van. Only one live camera, from inside the van, was filming me. It was far away, only capturing my back, and couldn’t pick up any
sound.
I stood at the door, rny mind blank for a few seconds.
I took out my phone and called my ex–boss, who was also my long–suffering best friend.
“Cole said to me, ‘Long time no see.”
I desperately needed her to pour a bucket of cold water on me right now.
“So? What else could he say?” she replied, just as I expected. “Let’s be real, who doesn’t have an ex? He has so many options. Why would he cho- ose you, a divorcee? Because of those few months you relied on each other? Honestly, that was the lowest point of his life. Who would want to
remember that?”
She was right.
I hung up and opened the door.
Cole was on a stepladder, fixing the light on the ceiling. As he raised his arm, the muscles rippled smoothly.
Just like before.
Except back then, he had a bandage wrapped around his waist from a wire–work accident.
The old–fashioned tungsten light in his hand flickered on and off.
It was all too familiar.
So familiar that I stood at the door, unable to step inside.
“Dinner,” he said, seeing me. A simple word, no extra emotion. It made my own unease seem out of place.
Iwas the one overthinking. For him, this show was probably just a safe way to publicize his divorce.
Chapter
2015
Outside, it was snowing. He was tall, with strong features, leaning over the counter preparing a hot pot. He exuded a sense of domesticity.
I took a picture of his back and posted it on social media, completing my task for the show.
After we ate, he didn’t even let me do the dishes. He washed his hands efficiently and then, strangely, started making the bed for me.
There was only one bed.
He said he would sleep on the floor.
“Your waist injury,” I asked, “do you need to change the bandage?”
“I can do it myself,” he said.
When I came out of the bathroom after my shower, a thin blanket was already spread out on the floor. He was rummaging through his suitcase for a long bandage.
I instinctively looked away and took out my phone.
Ashton sent me a voice message. My hands were wet, and I accidentally played it on speaker.
He had seen my post.
“You can handle hot pot? Last time at home, you said you wanted that cake from the bakery. I got it for you on my way.”
I had said I wanted that cake on my birthday last year. He never bought it for me. After all this time, he was only buying it now to maintain his
devoted” persona for the show.
I stared at my phone. The light above was blocked by Cole’s shadow.
“Can you help me?” he asked, holding the roll of bandage.
Didn’t he just say he could do it himself?
Changing the dressing, wrapping the bandage. My arms weren’t long enough, so I had to loosely encircle him with both hands.
This rental apartment in the north.
The heating was inadequate. The snowy, rainy air seeped in through the cracks of the old building.
It was so cold.
Yet we maintained our distance.
My fingertips could only touch the bandage.
His face had to be turned away, looking elsewhere.
Unlike that year, in the southern rental apartment.
Muggy and sunless.
It was so hot.
Yet again and again, as if there were no tomorrow, we possessed each other with abandon.
Click.
The tungsten light flickered on. We were standing under it.
In that year of poverty and hopelessness, we couldn’t even afford to replace a light bulb. We used it until it couldn’t be used anymore.
That old tungsten light, repaired again and again, would always flicker in the middle of the night.
Back then, an eighteen–year–old Cole had told me, “Every time it flickers, it means I’m thinking of you.”
Tonight, in an age where we lacked for nothing, the tungsten light flickered countless times.
I looked up at Cole. “You didn’t fix it properly?”
He froze, then looked down into my eyes.
hapter 1
“Yeah. I did it on purpose.”
“Why?” I asked
“If I fixed it, you wouldn’t hear it flicker.”
I was stunned.
He took the bandage from my hand and deftly wrapped it around himself.
“Chloe Taylor,” he said my name.
“Hmm?”
“Do you like hot pot, or do you like cake?”
One must always be honest about food.
“Hot pot.”
