I had thought the pain in my chest came from being too heartbroken over Nathan’s betrayal.It turned out my heart was actually falling.
“The doctor said your coronary arteries are severely blocked. You need bypass surgery immediately,” Collins said,his voice trembling.“If not,you won’t make it six more months.”
My hand froze over my chest and did not move.
“Did you hear me?“He raised his voice but tried to keep his emotions under control because he was afraid of startling me.“Your heart condition is three times worse than average. Your circulation is abnormal and any emotional stress could trigger a heart attack.”
My throat tightened and I wanted to say, “I’ve known for a long time that I’m not quite normal,” but I couldn’t get a word out.
I didn’t know this would happen,maybe,it’s just my fate.“I whispered, then was stunned for a
while.
“Don’t say that.“His voice dropped low as he suddenly stood up,rage flashing in his eyes. “Ever the worst fate can be fought. You’re with me now…I won’t let you die.”
“Do you think no one cares if you die anyway? Well…I do.”
“Laurissa Smith,did you hear me?I said I care!” His voice cracked with emotion and his eyes shimmered.
I was stunned by his statement that he cared.I did not understand how Collins,whom I had never known before,could care so much about my illness.
My heart was racing,so I clutched my chest. Apparently,my heart really wasn’t doing well.
Collins pushed the door and left with the doctor to talk about specific surgery arrangements.
At that moment, I realized that he did it not because of a fleeting impulse. He truly wanted to pull me back from the edge of death.
On the day the treatment started,right before I was wheeled into surgery,he held my hand. His voice was steady and firm:“Don’t be afraid. I’m right here.”
I smiled. “I’m not afraid.”
However,after the surgery,the pain was far worse than I had imagined. My chest felt like it was on fire and steel wire tightened around it.
Every bandage change,every time I had to turn over,every time I cleared the phlegm was torture.
I lost count of how many times I wanted to give up. However, every time I opened my eyes and saw him sitting at my bedside,I was unwilling even to blink.
One night,the pain was so unbearable that I became unconscious. The pain pump didn’t help anymore.I gritted my teeth and was forced to turn over. The bed was drenched with my sweat and my body shook uncontrollably. Tears rolled silently down my cheeks.
Collins squeezed my shoulder.“Hang in there. The doctor said you have to turn over,or blood clots might form.”
My voice was barely a whisper:“I…I can’t do this anymore….”
Chanter 30
4:26 pm DDDD
Collins did not say anything for a long time and suddenly held me gently, like holding a fragile porcelain doll.“Laurissa Smith,hold on a little longer,it’s over. You’ve made it through so much already,what’s this?”
I closed my eyes and shivered in his embrace.
He had a familiar scent,the usual minty shampoo I used to use as a teenager,sweet and cold,but unexpectedly,it soothed me at this moment.
No one knew I was with Collins. No one knew that I was being treated for a heart attack. Collins protected me inside a gentle embrace that he had woven meticulously for me. The days were uncharacteristically quiet, the windows were always lit with soft sunlight,the nurses came and left gently and the smell of medicine was masked by aromatherapy.
At night,I was leaning over the hospital bed for an infusion. The needle was inserted into the back of my hand and the cold liquid flowed into my veins drop by drop;my fingertips were a bit
numb.
My phone lay on my lap.Collins had just come back from the pharmacy with my favorite canned sweet orange juice syrup. He popped the lid and handed it to me.
“Eat more. You need sugar.”
I smiled and took it,but didn’t eat right away. Instead, I opened WhatsApp.
The feed suddenly refreshed and a familiar name popped up on my screen. Alicia had just posted
a new story.
