I muttered Ch 13

I smelled her perfume before I saw her—jasmine, silk, and power. Lady Vaela of the Western Vale. A noble by blood, war-trained, and more beautiful than I could ever imagine being. She walked like she owned the sky.

They held a banquet in her honor. I wasn’t invited. But I heard the fanfare from my chamber—the music, the laughter, the thunderous clink of goblets and heels on marble. My maids moved with extra urgency that day, fixing tapestries, fluffing pillows, wiping down every corner of my cage like the presence of royalty meant I should sparkle too.

One of them whispered while changing my sheets. “She’s arrived in a battle-carved cloak, can you imagine? Like she just stepped out of legend.”

The King introduced her publicly as an “ally to our Prince.”

I wasn’t in the room. But I heard enough.

Later, the maids brought back pieces of the speech like shards from a broken mirror. Vaela’s name on everyone’s tongue. The way she held a blade at the feast. How the nobles applauded when she said the Dire bloodline needed “stabilizing.”

That night, I tried not to ask.

But the words tore out anyway. “Is she the one they want for you?”

Cassian didn’t answer right away. He stood by the hearth, firelight carving shadows across his face. His jaw worked like he was grinding down something sharp.

“I don’t want to talk about her.”

“Too late,” I said. “She’s everywhere, Cassian. Her name. Her face. Her scent—on your clothes.”

That last part slipped out before I could stop it. Jealousy, uninvited and raw.

He crossed the room slowly and sat on the edge of my bed, hands heavy in his lap. He pulled off his gloves one finger at a time, like the conversation burned.

“They want a queen,” he said. “Someone polished. Untouched. Someone they can dress up and display without questions.”

“And me?” I asked, my voice small. “What does that make me?”

He looked up then — really looked. His eyes weren’t cold or dismissive. They were wrecked.

“It makes you mine,” he said quietly.

The words hit harder than I was ready for.

“I fought for you,” I said. “I bled for you. I bonded with you before I even knew what that meant. I chose you when it would’ve been easier to run.”

“I know.” His voice was rough. “And I see it, every damn day.”

“Then why does it feel like you’re pulling away?”

He shook his head, more defeated than angry. “I’m trying to keep you safe, Lucy. From them. From her. From what this court does to people like you. People like us.”

I pulled my hand back, already expecting the silence that followed.

But this time, he didn’t let me.

He reached for my hand and gripped it hard. His warmth flooded mine.

“Vaela wants me,” he said, looking me dead in the eyes. “They all do. For power. For bloodlines. But I don’t want her.”

“Could’ve fooled me,” I muttered.

He didn’t flinch. He leaned closer instead, his voice dropping to something only meant for me.

“She smiles at me because they tell her to. I smile back because I have to survive. But I come here every night. I come to you.”

“Because I’m a secret?” I asked, pain flaring in my chest.

“No,” he said, fierce now. “Because you’re the only part of my life that isn’t built on lies.”

The fire cracked in the hearth, but the only warmth I felt came from his words.

“I love you, Lucy,” he said. “Not her. Not the court. Not the crown. You.”

My throat tightened. “Then why haven’t you marked me?”

“Because once I do, there’s no turning back. No undoing it. And I won’t put that on you until you’re ready. Until you know it’s your choice—not something I force on you because I’m afraid of losing you.”

I stared at him. At this man who had fought wars, bled for crowns, and still knelt at my side like I was the only thing worth fighting for.

“I just… I need to know I matter more than politics.”

He leaned in then and pressed his forehead to mine.

“You are,” he whispered. “You’re the reason I’m still fighting.”

I overheard the servants later.

“They’re calling her the new Dire Queen already.”

“She’ll fix what that Omega girl ruined.”

“She’s proper. Regal. She knows how to fight and curtsy.”

“And she’s not cursed,” another added in a hushed voice. “That matters.”

The laughter that followed was crueler than a slap.

Later, I stood at the window and watched her. Lady Vaela. She trained in the courtyard in full armor, a blade glinting in her hand. Her footwork was perfect. Her smile sharper than her steel. She moved like she wasn’t performing—but she knew people were watching. She liked it.

Cassian stood across from her, his hands behind his back.

They sparred. And he laughed. The sound of it shattered something inside me. He hadn’t laughed like that in my presence in days. Not since the cage.

Not since the court reminded him what I was—and what I wasn’t.

I turned from the window and let the curtains fall shut.

The bond flickered again, soft and quiet. Reaching.

But I didn’t reach back.

I started wondering if love meant anything in a world ruled by thrones.