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Chapter8
I drove like a maniac, and even lost control of the wheel but reached home safely. Her calls were constantly irritating me, I threw my cell phone against the wall and ran straight to the shower, scrubbing, crying and bleeding.
I woke up with a sudden jolt, my body trembled and I was sweating like the sun was shining just
upon me.
I rubbed my stinging eyes harshly and kicked the coffee table in agony. Leo is gone. She is not here. It’s been a week, since that night.
A week of rotting in guilt, a week of agony and misery. The worst week of my life.
I checked the time ran to the bathroom to clean up and went straight to my friend’s office, who is also an Attorney. Haunting, cursed words of my wife rang in my head, and my desperation was turning into determination and anger, towards myself for bringing this upon family.
But I’ll be damned if I let my family, my wife and my daughter leave me.
“Do you hear yourself, Will, you sound like a lunatic. I can’t fucking believe it. You cheated on that woman, my God.” He exclaimed running a hand down his face in exasperation and disbelief. I hung my head blinking my eyes hard. I needed to stay awake, I needed to bring my family back.
“I am not here to hear the obvious Jerome. You promised if I ever need you’ll help.” I replied tightly. I knew I deserved that shit but I was losing it with every passing second.
He looked away and exhaled deeply before turning his back to me.
“I’ll help, but don’t expect any sympathy from my side. What you did to Leona is unforgivable and I support her decision for divorce, but as promised I’ll help.” He says.
“I don’t want to give you any explanations. I want my daughter and wife back.” I answered back.
“Be thankful she hasn’t sued you for adultery and custody.” He hisses and I slam my hand on the table, he glares at me right back as I fume in anger.
What’s happening to you, Will? You were never the one to get furious about such things. Shaking my head I stormed out of his office and made my way to my car to drive back home Walking in, I glanced around the living room I trashed last night.
The hollow silence and the unorganised stuff mocked me, calling me out for my sins. I glanced around once again, wishing it was a nightmare and this wasn’t happening. But the reality of my actions announced it better.
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I made my way to the kitchen for a glass of water and stared at the fruit basket. Both my girls love fruits, Leona would cut them down into chunks and make a fruit salad almost every day. I dropped the glass in the sink, unable to drink the water.
My chest was again filling up with the void, an abrupt discomfort building with the constant reminder that they were gone, I had pushed them away.
The sole purpose of life, my happiness, wasn’t here and it made me self murderous that I was the one who caused that.
There were a lot of things you wished you hadn’t seen in your life, the cruellest of all, was your breaking down in tears caused by your betraying actions.
Your infidelity, your negligence, by taking her for granted, jeopardising your love and marriage.
I caressed our family photo on the wall above the fireplace, silent tears streaming down my face. We looked so happy and healthy.
Every time we have a kid, Will, we would replace the picture with another one we take.
wife
My wife’s sweet voice rings in my ear. I closed my eyes imaging her, but the only vision that appeared was her bloodshot eyes and her dishevelled state. My eyes shot open as I struggled to stop the early cries that would leave my mouth.
Her agony was twisting the arrows of guilt deeper into my heart and conscience. Her cries haunted my dreams and her hatred darkened my life.
I know the severity of my deeds, I know what I let happen is unforgivable but I simply can’t let her go. I can’t give up, fighting for her love and forgiveness, fighting for my daughter is the only way to make this right.
I might have been too lost in my thoughts that I didn’t hear the door screech open because when I turned around my parents were standing right in front of me. My mother’s eyes were swollen and fresh tears brimmed her beautiful blue eyes.
“Mom,” I choked out but the sympathy soon changed into anger and a loud and clear smack was etched onto my face, the impact of it stocking up on my remorse.
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